Today. Today was a hard day. A difficult day. A very emotional day. One that rips at the heart, shuts down the breathing process, and reduces you to a sobbing broken heart. We die. We know that. It's just that. Children aren't supposed to die. Not suddenly. Without a clue. And with an "inconclusive" autopsy. It's just.not.supposed.to happen this way.
And the parents ~ Jamie crying in my arms, "I know where she is. I do. I know. But I want her here. I want her here right now." and the father, Rick ~ a tall, tall man folding half way to the ground just to hold me and cry as if his heart had been cut in two. And it had. and the brother? Tyler ~ shell shocked. Those were the only words that come to mind.
And the crowd. so.so.silent. The graveside service in an ancient cemetery filled with the thoughts of generations of family. You could hear the breeze whisper. It was that quiet. Children. Parents. Family. Friends. Angels. I know they had to be there. Too many of us were praying for them to hold us all, to comfort us, to lift us above the pain and grief.
And then, there was the other grief. This was the first time since the accident that I had been with so many from school. The school I called my second home for almost twenty years. The school I left through no wish of my own. The life I used to have. The life I still miss and am adjusting without. So many teachers, so many parents, so many students. The headache began on the way there and intensified to the point that speech became next to impossible. Thoughts were fragmented like broken glass and frustration took over.
And the tears came. It would have been so easy to just have sunk to the ground with the sadness of it all. To leave that sorrow within the confines of a piece of ground used to tears of the grieving. But no, there were too many around. So with His arms around me, and John's strength holding me up both literally and figuratively we walked that long walk back to the car. And I cried. Most of the way home. Four extra strength Excedrin's and five hours later, it had abated somewhat.
But Rick, Jamie, and Tyler? Their long night has just begun. Dying is easy. I know. It's living that's hard. And telling someone that where they have gone is so much more than one can imagine, is just not the words they want to hear. Like Jamie kept saying, "I want her here. I want her here right now." Oh, what anguish our heavenly Father had to have felt for His Own. And I know. I know He was crying with us today.
Skylar Dawn Norton~
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8 comments:
We have prayed for this family. It sends chills through me as I hear my children playing in the other room. Only God can comfort their grief - and He'll do that through their friends - like you.
Oh, what anguish our heavenly Father had to have felt for His Own. And I know. I know He was crying with us today.
He was crying with us........that I have faith in.
Oh...this is SO sad. My heart breaks for you and for Skylar's family. I will keep you all in my prayers that you may feel the love of our Heavenly Father at this most difficult time.
{{hugs}}
Jo-Anne
My heart just goes out to that family. I cannot even begin to imagine the grief they are going through--it is just heart breaking to think about. I pray that God will continue to hold them tightly in his loving arms and give them peace.
My name is Kaitlin.
I was a friend of Skylar's.
I remeber when we first became friends in fifth grade at a beta club field trip to the animal shelter. Then after i went to her house. So after that i came over to her house often.
Skylar was a beautiful person.
She was nice to everyone and she made good grades.
Friday October,3,2008
I was going to the fair with my friends Jessica. On the way to jessica's house we passed by Skylar's ambulance.(we didn't know at the time.) When I came home from the fair (my mama left me a note to wake her up) my mama told me she said that one of my good friends have died. I sat down and she told me. I was in so much shock and disbelief. I went to go change clothes and i was walking kinda fast and breething heavily. Finally i had to sit down I stayed up till' 2:00 in the morning crying.The next morning I woke up it felt like a dream. Saturday October,4th,2008 We had a cheerleading game and I cried there.
Monday October,6,2008 was awful going into the school. The 7th& 8th grade hall was quiet. You could hear people crying.
The fifth& Sixth grade hall was loud.
I feel sad and pray for Skylar's family and friends.
But, God will help us get through this.
found this page randomly looking for a tattoo I want. I too lost a child suddenly with no explanation. I cried as I read this every word rings true. I remember my arms aching I wanted to hold her so bad just one more time...I am so sorry for your loss..
Jessica mommy to
Alyssa 06/01/2000-08/02/2000
Skylar was my cousin. I remember the day she died very well. My grandmother called and told me. It was so sad. I found this and I would like to ask permission to use it on a memorial I made for her on www.findagrave.com.
James, I would be honored to have you use what you need. I would appreciate if you would include the site address. I am Skylar's second grade teacher as well as kin through marriage. She was special then and even moreso now as she frolics in His Garden. Thank you for taking the time to come here.
If you'll scroll down, you'll find a listing of subjects. I have Skylar listed as there is more than once that I wrote of her. I would love to see your site for her and think it's a beautiful thing you're doing.
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