Faith, Family and Friends: Tidbits of Me

Showing posts with label Tidbits of Me. Show all posts

I Am Such a Winter Gal!

i love the virgin beauty it brings

the way it cloaks harsh edges

and cardinals stand out

oh, i love cardinals

i am loving our days of cold

I struggled on my calling after a divorce. There were feelings of letting God down as a good wife along with all the hurtful thoughts Satan throws at a hurting heart. With a three year old depending on me, I headed to a different state and a new job.

Having a blind date a month later, at a Sunday night worship service, led to a growing love with a man where my heart felt safe. Knowing God was as important to him as he was to me, our relationship deepened and led to very short courtship. Again, God works in mysterious ways. Within just months of our marriage, my beloved grandmother was diagnosed with stomach cancer and I was able to help my mother with 24 hour care. Isn't it amazing that He knows what's coming when we still feel Life is just nicely rolling along?

Fast forward and I began trying to get pregnant, which had always been difficult. Earlier, I had turned in an application to teach thinking if I made my requirements too particular they'd never call. "Man plans, and God chuckles". They called. And I got pregnant. I received a call to teach a second grade class at a local elementary school. I didn’t want to teach. I wanted a baby. However, an early miscarriage took place and in August 1986, I began teaching a small group of children. With each passing year I fell deeper and deeper in love with the blessing God had given. For twenty years I taught second grade with a great staff, with those that became best friends. I loved my calling and where God had definitely led me.

April 21, 2006. A scheduled outpatient procedure with a Dr we’d yet to meet. They simply had an opening and we were to meet him prior to the procedure. Never met him. And Life as we knew it changed. God allowed Satan to create anger, chaos and horrid mistakes within that procedure room which resulted in my death. Then God stepped into this chaos and order was restored. What followed was resuscitation from a Dr called up from ER, as the Dr in charge had charged out of the room in anger, and the next 77 days in an ICU room. I became a very, very sick patient. Five days after the mistakes made by a doctor, who clearly was dealing with issues of his own, my body began a hard fought battle with ARDS from lungs that collapsed during the procedure. I died twice more during the days my precious family and friends lived through on the wings of prayers of thousands. (Years later we were still meeting people, who when they heard my name, told how they and their church had prayed for me. For us.) I began a long 18 month recovery upon returning home July 1, our 23rd wedding anniversary.

I had taken a two year Medical Leave but three of my five specialists diagnosed me with PTSD and could not, in good conscience, give their approval that I be allowed to return to my classroom, citing my health issues rendering me incapable of being an effective teacher. My principle, one of my dearest friends, concurred. It broke my heart. It was 'my calling' and

left me in a dark place of “where do I belong, God?!” Anger that he allowed it was tempered with the blessings that came with the accident. Blessings we couldn’t ignore. But still I struggled to find ‘my place’ in the world.

Our children had their own families. My health kept me from jobs and volunteer work I yearned to do. Years of counseling helped with the PTSD, but brought to the surface events I'd tried hard to forget. Crimes against women I was told not to speak of, though I was the victim. Subjects we shy from and, sadly, creates feelings of isolation. With counseling, I moved from victim to survivor. It then reaches a point you have to use what you’ve learned and let Him lead. My prayers went from “Why, God” to “What now?!”

Thankfully, God never gives up on us. He brings those into our life with the wisdom to lead us to where he wants us to go. It’s still been a roller coaster the last 12 years, with health issues and wanting to go where I felt led. Only to find He had other plans. Friends I loved that left. Friends that came into this ‘new normal’ bringing their knowledge, their love, their

friendship. I remain amazed at how God works to show himself to us.

I never question anymore. I’ve come to know and love the Holy Spirit as I never had before. I’ve thrived with the immeasurable help and love of the Lion of Judah. A God that never left. Was always near. Forgiving. Second chances. Waiting for me to realize I only need to allow him to lead me where he wanted me to go. Friends that pray with me and over me.

With me, an oldest child that was used to being in control, he had his hands full. But he never let me go. And I am eternally grateful for the last 12 years and its blessings. April remains a month of remembrance, some days of hibernation and crying in the arms of a man that understands, realizing I lost years of teaching in a classroom that had become my home away from home with children that became beautiful pieces of my heart. Dear friends I saw each day. But God had other plans and Life goes on. My counselor asked once, if knowing everything I now know, would I go through it again. My answer? A quick "Yes!" For His blessings upon us and our family and friends that walked through this journey with us are infinite. And still occurring.

My time in heaven when I died in that procedure room is another story. A beautiful one that gets me thru the rough times. You'll find it up on the left side bar, a '77 Day Sleep'. There is a heaven. There is a thin line between reality and eternity. There is a mighty and loving God.

PS~take that, Satan!

Spring Is Here~But Winter Hasn't Left!

oh i love old trucks

and petals scattered

under my feet

like doTerra oils? we do

and i love these combos!

right click, save to computer, and print out

for a sweet Spring quote to frame ~

Happy Spring, dear friends ~

Winter In the South

i love winter. won't make any bones about it. it's a time of rest. reflection. hot chocolate and a fire in the fireplace. a time to slow down. soft talks at night. soup and crusty bread. endless cups of coffee with various creamers for the holidays. it's my favorite time of the year. always has been.

cardinals. my favorite bird. especially the males with their colorful red in a white world with green hollies in bloom. they remind, and i know not why, of being messengers. they turn up to make one smile. they seem to know when you need to see them. could they be sent to make us remember better times, loved ones no longer here, eternity that will be filled with peace. watch for them. they come when they sense a need. truly. as do dragonflies. but that's another story.

walking on a bridge in a snowy wonderland. romantic. i wonder how many engagements have taken place here? how many have expressed love here? how quiet the snow makes our world. it blankets out loudness, animals settle in to hibernate and sleep. daily outside noise vanishes. all lies dormant. beautifully so.

i know not where this is other than a street my heart takes me to in my dreams. belgium? rome? paris, oslo? i pray that he will show me these places in my dreams once this life is over and there's beauty i still haven't seen. i wonder, do the people who walk these streets wish to walk the streets here? hmmm ~

sadness. so much sadness. 84 deaths and counting just in our state alone. from flu and flu related illnesses. death is no respecter of persons. we've lost family, friends and oh, we've lost our young. those that die with our dreams. this year has been a terrible one with this illness that takes us to such sickness.

our youngest and her family. just prior to going to look at the christmas lights in the town, suburbs and various areas that still love to decorate and set out luminaries. i miss that as our current home is in a suburb that doesn't but oh, we've lived where they do. and it's not only beautiful but brings us back to the heart of christmas with the lighting of a candle. a star.

I Love to Dream ~

One of my very favorite posts that I enjoy reading and swooning over the photos, is the following ~ I hope you enjoy, it as much as I. And have a beautiful Tuesday. It's still warmer than normal for our part of the world and I'm so looking forward to cooler days that don't shift back into Summer mode and, just maybe, the hint of Winter bliss. Godere ~

Do You Dream?

March! You hold the whisper of Spring!

Jenny kiss'd me when we met,

jumping from the chair she sat in;

Time, you thief, who love to get

sweets into your list, put that in!

Say I'm weary, say I'm sad,

say that health and wealth have miss'd me,

Say I'm growing old,

but add Jenny kiss'd me.

by Leigh Hunt, 1784-1859

~~~~~~

I had this memorized by the time we brought our baby girl, our Jenny, home. As she grew, many a time she'd run to me, just long enough to wrap her arms around me, kiss me and tell me she loved me, before running off to continue her play. It's heart memories that will carry me through many a day.

Bits & Pieces

Life can be complicated. Easy. Hard. Complex and, yet, there's always someone or something that causes me to smile. It's usually then that I remember the One that formed me also set the stars in the sky and knows me better than I know myself. We all have our hurts, pain, and memories we'd love to forget. But along with those are the tender, precious, beloved memories we pray not to ever let slip from our minds. This past year has brought many emotions, along with finding more about life, God, and the sifting of friends I've known for decades and some I've only met the last few years. Each special in a season of my life. Some have gone on. Some have stayed. Some have backed off for one reason or another. It's Life. And it's expected.

He never backs off. We do, but He doesn't. He's always there, waiting for us to call upon Him to praise Him, need Him, or just want to rest within His love. I am a very thankful child of a very loving King. His Spirit teaches me and helps me understand so that forgiveness comes easy. Life is good, as long as I'm closely aligned with Him. Aaaaannnddd, He knows just how much I love

SNOW! It snows very little where we live. (Did I say 'very'?) We see more ice. Maybe it will snow this year?! Probably NOT. So, with that, here some photos of past snows, sweet babies and memories from the heart ~

Our home, January 2008

Snow! On Christmas Day!

Oh, sweet 'laina. Barely three years old.

My princess.

A trip to Gatlinburg in February 2009. Snow, snow, snow!

The smile is genuine.

And at The Park in March '09!

I was in heaven. Beautiful.

Back in the 'burg, Fall 2010, looking for snow and finding it.

And blessed with another baby girl ~

ElleBelle was headed toward her second birthday here with her Daddy.

We moved to the Coast in 2011, so there was sand.

Not snow. But we got some Winter loving.

They got snow and so did Gulf Shores! What excitement!

The beaches were covered with snow and ice.

It was also the first time I learned that hearing pinetree limbs cracking

and falling off the trees was NOT fun! It meant clean up.

We were blessed with a new grandson.
Sweet Owen celebrated his first birthday that Spring.
Snow and a first birthday within months of each other.

Another decade for me this year

and the hopes that it WILL snow before 2016.

It does NOT look like it'll happen, but one can hope!

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Have an awesome week, snow or no snow!!

oh, in love with autumn

oh. i am so in love with autumn

and i love to waltz thru pinterest and dream

like today, like now

with this adorable house

it would be mine

#13 would be the home of a sweet older lady

who would keep delicious smells wafting in and through

our shared porches and patios

yummy simple meals

i live next door, behind the green door

and i bake desserts to go with our meals together

but today is a great day to wander

i wonder how long it has been since a train traveled these tracks

what did the passenger cars look like

were there more people going home or visiting family

oh, what beauty they had from their windows

when i was younger, my family traveled on the hummingbird

from central florida to montgomery alabama

it's a heart memory i hold close

walking home, d i notice i need to clean up the table

site of our impromptu meal last night at dusk

much loved linens on the table and mismatched pieces

we toasted to cooler weather

the beauty of our God's painting

and to each other's continued good health

my sassy greeted me at the door with kisses

lots of kisses and snuggles

sweet pup, we have a mutual admiration and love

they imprint forever on our hearts

just ask anyone that's loved and lost

it hurts forever

we'll cuddle up in my cloud, get cozy, maybe

revisit the beauty of today and its' blessings

drift off in mounds of softness

and mushy pillows

until tomorrow's light peeps in

do you dream

i always have

i believe that dreams of tomorrow

become the realities of today

so hold on to dreams

they do come true

have a blessed week, a thanksgiving time of

remembering your blessings

heart memories

and feel free to use these two free printables.

Getting Lost In a Photo

growing up and spending time at my grandparents

there was a creek, much like this, that ran down

behind the two front pastures. there used to be an old

homestead there, for flowers grow that wouldn't

normally be there ~ and before that, an indian village.

we used to find arrow heads and old pieces of pottery

it was a creek my grandmother and i would hike up

our pants legs, she her dress and apron, and walk until

we met the dirt road on one end of the pastures.

we'd sit on the sand and watch what floated down.

leaves, sticks, sometimes turtles would venture out

and always crayfish and little bitty fish

as i grew older and commissioners worked and reworked

the dirt road, the creek became muddier and filled

with waste and trash from man. beavers built a dam.

the land, no longer kept back by my grandfather,

began to encroach upon the creek banks and the creek

became smaller. i grew older, and no longer small

there are times we wish childhood could last longer

that memories could whisk us back just one more day

one more walk, one more hat made with daisies

but then, to do that, we'd lose part of today

and that would be a tragedy

for today are tomorrow's memories and i

wouldn't miss this season we are now in

with it's vibrant colors and cooling temps

letting us know that a season is on it's way

that will slow us down and create a quiet

sense of hibernation, the time of rest

the creek will ice over, weeds will die, and quiet

will be broken only be a cracking icy branch

and the memories of my youth will remain

as vividly as the colors of autumn, all i have to do

is close my eyes, lift my face to the breeze

and let my mind roam back. and back. and back.

Guess I'm Not the Only One

From the looks of the blogs I follow, I'm not the only one that seems to not be taking the time to update and keep current my blog. It first began as a means to document family news, then with the way it expanded I began showcasing blogs I visited and thought you may enjoy as well!

Then I discovered Pinterest. Oh.My. Pinterest. If you haven't checked it out yet or begun your own boards, it's a new and interesting place to share and find information on everything. EVERYTHING!

I'm not sure how many boards I presently have but I love and learn from each and every pin placed on a board! Talk about adding to my Bucket List!! Here's a few recent pins ~

This is found on the board 'Adorable Abodes'.

I could SO live here, in England. On the water.

'Amazing Architecture'

And there are some awesome examples!

The one above is on the National Register

of Historic Places. It's a round barn!

'Beauty of Birds'

God didn't have to make so many,

with such different colorings,

and amazing features.

But He did. For us.

'Breads & Appetizers'

I love food. I hate weight gain.

But I love food.

And I love this recipe!

'Free Fonts'

Yep. They're free.

I just can't understand how to

download them. But bet you can.

Go visit. And in the meantime,

I'll try to do a better job of

keeping my blog up with fun sites

and neat home decor ideas!

Bits 'n Pieces Of the Week

I love the saying. Love the color. Love hearts.

Owen is one today! Happy Birthday, sweet child.

Pa and Nan love you deeply.

I am so thankful that my King is also a Father that loves and gives me grace and mercy. He is already in tomorrow so there's no need to worry (although sometimes that's a hard, I'm human). And He will be with me wherever I go. He promises and He never breaks a promise.

And this photo? Well, it's under my 'Just For Me' board on Pinterest. I can get lost in this photo, wandering up the streets, and pretending to live behind one of the charming wooden doors. I've never been here but my dreams take me to an endless number of places. Blessed to have been given the chance to imagine ~ were you?

For the Love of a Horse~

"The wind of heaven

is that which blows

between a horse's ears."

-Arabian Proverb

"A horse is the projection of peoples' dreams about themselves - strong, powerful, beautiful - and it has the capability of giving us escape from our mundane existence."

-Pam Brown

"Tis said a dog is man's best friend,

but the horse?

The horse wrote history."

"Wherever man has left his footprint in the long ascent from barbarism to civilization, we will find the hoofprint of the horse beside it."

- John Moore

Weekend Favorites

Our sweet Owen is growing so quickly

and I found this, read it, and loved it.

A few favorites from the weekend ~

It's been a restful weekend, but also one of getting things accomplished. Don't you just love the self-satisfaction of finishing a project?! I do and I will be feel soooo self-satisfied when we finish our guest bath. To bring a shadowy idea to fruition will be nice, especially since I keep second guessing myself or wondering which way would be the easiest, yet prettiest, way to stencil. AND to find just what I want to stencil. Yeah, pray for me. And for The Hood. I foresee some patience being tried {wink font} on BOTH our parts. Have a great week!